Tag Archives: menopause

Family and strange coincidences

I think you all probably know that I had an oophrectomy abut a year and a half ago. The weird thing is that my sister had one shortly afterwards, for a different reason to mine. She also ended up with a tooth access right after too, so I think she’s just a big copycat.

I haven’t had a chance to talk to her about it since, and since I’m having so much trouble with finding an HRT that works I thought I’d ask if she was taking any and, if so, which one. It just so happens she’s not. The reason she isn’t is that they discovered she has an abnormality on her liver (effectively a birthmark). She’s older enough than me to make not taking HRT acceptable from a bone density point of view (by 4 years, the cut of is around age 50), she says she hasn’t been too badly affected by menopause symptoms, so she’s relatively lucky, as surgical meno can be brutal. Makes me wonder if this HRT lark is worth the trouble, but there’s no telling. I could be a million times worse with no hormones, but it has certainly given me something to think about.


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Gel was spread, tablet was taken. Not sure what is a side effect so going to chronicle everything and see if there is any pattern.
Slight feeling of agitation immediately after application.
Eyes still feel gritty and focus is still off.
Woke during the night but got back to sleep.
Woke tired.
Slight headache. Brain feels too big for my skull
Lower abdomen tender.
Mood still the same – feel flat.
Feel slight brain fog.

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The day knitting happened.

Yup, I know you doubt me, but it’s true. I knitted today.

Things have been off kilter for a while, as not just with my knitting. My brain hasn’t been working properly. It still isn’t to be honest, and it has caused chaos. Work has suffered, to the extent that two weeks ago I resigned.
I had spent the weekend before having anxiety induced chest pains and panic attacks. It was the culmination of about a month of making errors, having memory problems, suffering insomnia, and getting more and more upset and anxious. All of these things spiralled and fed off each other until the tension built up in my chest. The pain was so intense, if I hadn’t known it was anxiety, I’d have thought I was having a heart attack. It crept up my chest to my neck and at that point I had to lie down. I couldn’t move for about five minutes. And afterwards I felt like I had pulled a muscle or three. At that point my decision was made. I couldn’t continue on the same path. I needed to step away.

Currently not working. Anxiety has reduced, but not gone. Insomnia is better, but not gone. Depression lingers, as depression is wont to do.

All of this is a consequence of changing my HRT (with possibly a detour via post surgery/anaesthesia effects). In the next few days I get a new set of hormones to try. Half of me is hopeful that this will be my fix. The other half dreads that this will make things worse.

Time will tell.

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